Gary S. Gonser

Gary Stewart Gonser, beloved husband, dad, grandpa, and friend, passed peacefully into our Heavenly Father’s arms on January 14, 2026. Throughout his journey of 83 years, Gary touched many lives with his compassion, wisdom, and witty sense of humor. His big hugs, smiling eyes, and infectious laughter will be deeply missed.

Gary was born July 29, 1942 in Devils Lake, ND, the youngest of three children to Quentin and Helen (Sneesby) Gonser. The Gonsers moved to Bismarck when Gary was very young, and his childhood was filled with hunting, fishing, and enjoying nearly every sport. Gary was unable to serve his country due to a heart murmur, but he enthusiastically trained as a Cadet in the Civil Air Patrol. He was proud of his time learning how to fly and assisting in various search and rescue missions.

After graduating from Bismarck High in 1960, Gary attended Bismarck University. On the morning of January 8, 1962, God had something special planned for Gary as he hurried to class. He slipped on the ice and broke his ankle, and at that serendipitous moment he met his future wife, Constance (Conni) Freeberg of Mercer, ND. Conni and her friends were on their way to anatomy class when they saw Gary slip on the ice, papers flying as he went down in pain. Conni was insistent on helping him, and the rest is history. Gary always loved to say he “fell for Conni before he even met her.” They married on August 9, 1964 and shared 61 loving, adventurous years together.

Gary and Conni moved several times early on as their studies, careers, and family life developed. From Bismarck University, Gary transferred to the University of North Dakota and finished college at Mankato State University, graduating with a bachelor’s degree in business management. Soon after graduating, Gary and Conni welcomed their first daughter, Ginger, and moved to Rochester, MN for Gary to begin a sales position at 3M. They again relocated, this time to Brooklyn Park, MN, and their second daughter, Jennifer, was born. During this time, Gary’s passion for real estate began to take shape while working at Bermel-Smaby Realtors and Burnet Gagner Realty, and the family ultimately moved to Fargo where Gary continued his career in real estate at Gallery of Homes. He would go on to sell through Park Co. and RE/MAX, enjoying the camaraderie of each company and making lifelong friends along the way. With a natural strength for sales and his love for connecting with people, real estate was a career ready-made for his outgoing personality and his desire to help others in any way that he could. Gary carved out a niche for himself with his thoughtful and caring approach to selling clients their perfect home. His professionalism earned him high respect among his peers, and he enjoyed mentoring new Realtors and welcoming them into the real estate community. Many would agree that he was a “full-service” Realtor, frequently giving tours to buyers who were new to the Fargo-Moorhead area, helping to spruce up a house he had listed, or hosting clients for dinner in his home. His thoughtful connections with clients often evolved into lasting friendships.

Gary was very intentional with his spare time and found many ways to give generously to his community. He enjoyed sharing his gifts at Olivet Lutheran Church in choir, bible studies, men’s groups, and special projects over the years. He helped to ease homelessness in the community, working closely with Churches United in their mission to shelter the homeless at local churches during cold winter spells. He was also passionate about volunteering at the YWCA as a Volunteer Programs Committee member. In 2018, Gary received the YWCA Friend Award for his dedication to helping women rebuild their lives. He developed and taught an Improving Credit class as part of the YWCA’s Education and Employment Program at the Emergency Shelter. His class helped women better understand their credit scores so they could take steps to improve their credit rating and gain access to safe housing. His life was lived with a passion for helping others and seeking justice for the underdog, bringing to life Matthew 25:40: “And the King will answer them, ‘Truly, I say to you, as you did it to one of the least of these my brothers, you did it to me.’”

Gary found great delight in exploring a myriad of interests throughout his life. He enjoyed creating stained glass lamps and window hangings, baking bread using his grandmother’s recipe, and making home-brewed beer. Music was second nature to him and he loved sharing his musical talents in choirs, small groups, and solos for special occasions with Conni accompanying him on the piano. He enjoyed playing folk guitar and even learned a bit of flamenco. He was also a skilled sailor, motorcyclist, and long-distance bicyclist. On his 50th birthday, he bicycled to Itasca State Park. The following year, he and a friend bicycled from North Dakota to the state of Washington, and on his 60th birthday, he bicycled around the entire perimeter of North Dakota. One of his favorite motivational quotes, “You must believe to achieve,” exemplified his determination and endurance.

Beyond all else, Gary loved and valued his family deeply, putting them first in everything he did. His children and grandchildren brought him immense joy, and he took pride in celebrating both their greatest achievements and the simple, meaningful moments of their everyday lives. He was always front and center at his daughters’ music and sports activities, and never missed cheering his grandchildren on at their games or performances. One of his most endearing qualities was his goofiness that kept everyone giggling until his final days. His clever sense of humor lifted every heart in the room, and he never lost touch with his sense of childlike wonder, especially when spending time with his grandkids. His family will always remember the silly impromptu moments that made each of them feel like they were the most important person in the world to him, and each of them truly were.

Visiting and sharing stories was a favorite pastime of Gary’s, and even though he endured a lengthy battle with dementia and had all but lost the ability to converse, he was still able to convey his humor and fun-loving personality in many other ways. One of the greatest gifts was that he recognized his family with a big smile and long hug each time they visited. As his transition to the end neared, he was moved to hospice care at HIA Heather’s House in Fargo. Gary spent his final days in comfort with his eyes closed but his ears and heart open to the sounds of his family and friends visiting around him, singing his favorite songs to him, and telling him how much they loved him.

Gary is survived by his loving wife, Conni, daughters Ginger (Jahmal) and Jennifer (Chris) Songstad, grandchildren Anais Sidonia, Dalton Songstad, and Hadley Songstad, and several nieces and nephews.

Gary was preceded in death by his parents, Quentin Gonser and Helen Gonser, and his two older sisters Carolee Conyne and Gayle Bonds.

Gary’s celebration of life will be on February 13 at 11:00am at Olivet Lutheran Church in Fargo, ND, with visitation one hour prior to services. A light lunch will be served in Fellowship Hall immediately following the service. Internment will follow at Sunset Memorial Gardens in Fargo. Your presence would mean so much to Gary’s family.